REGION – In recent times, it has become common to hear that a family member does not talk to “that sister or brother” anymore. “They live 2,000 miles away, but that isn’t far enough!” Mom passes, and one sibling only wants the silverware, while another quietly swoops in and takes it home.
“Avoidance is the best short-term strategy to escape conflict, and the best long-term strategy to ensure suffering.” – Burchard.
Avoidance, the approach for those whose stress response tends to be flight or freeze, tends to have many unforeseen consequences. “Aiming to simply avoid and discourage conflicts generally results in family members or coworkers feeling shut down, resentful, and misunderstood.” – Simperingham.
Integrating mindful, unemotional, and restorative practices with a trained professional help can support the overall health of the family or business unit. Teammates with a new vocabulary of peaceful disagreement and sorting, with tools at their disposal, will be more successful.
“Clarity planning” is when you meet with a professional to brain storm, scratch out a worksheet, and have a safe, fair conversation about pending future events. Next, you arrive at a clarity document everyone signs off on. Often times having ground rules and meetings run by a professional in conflict consulting can help make crooked roads straighter before people get inflamed with emotion.
At The Flat Table, you can do and clarify the things that need addressing.
Workplace trainings and facilitation is also available to refresh aspirations, goals, values, and mission.
Tom Salmon has performed various conflict resolution roles, formal and informal, spanning a 30-year career as a certified public accountant (CPA), credentialed educator, Vermont state official, United States Navy Senior Chief (retired Seabee), and federal senior executive (SES). He is a Dispute Resolution Programs Act (DRPA) certified mediator, and has facilitated leadership and peacebuilding seminars for over 1,000 civilian and military personnel. In December 2023, Tom earned his master’s degree in conflict resolution, and seeks to help families and individuals, businesses and organizations with clarity planning, leadership training, and conflict prevention and resolution consulting.
Here is what clients have said about Tom: “Tom helped me reach all nine of my goals from his workshop on goal setting, including quitting smoking.” – Ryan H., Springfield.
“Tom provided our family with support in a range of areas throughout an incredibly challenging year. We are grateful for his wise, down to earth and practical advice, in addition to offering care.” – Pamela W., Brattleboro.
For more information, visit www.theflattable.com.
Written by Tom Salmon, The Flat Table.